Crisis points, inflection points, points of major change.  They aren’t bad, even though they may be uncomfortable.  Often, they are uncomfortable.  Think of starting a new habit with your body – a stretch, jogging, or climbing a hill.  Your body is going to speak to you and let you know that this is out of character, and difficult.  Your body is going to warn you to check it out and make sure you want to go ahead with it.  And if you evaluate it, and decide that it has value and merit, you go ahead with it.  Sometimes we don’t get a choice about whether a change is coming – like in times of crisis.  We have to “climb the hill” – one way or another.  But we always a get a choice about how we climb.  How we choose to speak and think about it are in our control.  We can tell the story as if this is the worst hill that ever came along, and it will ruin our lives.  Or we can tell the story as if this hill is hard and difficult and painful, but we know we’ll get through it in a meaningful way.  We know that we will learn something and grow.  We have that capacity as adults.  If no one modeled that for us, then we didn’t have that capacity as children.  But life is always presenting us with opportunities to grow up those young parts of ourselves.  The crisis points and hills are redundancies built in to allow us to learn this time, what we may not have been able to learn before.  Today, I will find hope in the opportunity to grow to my fullest potential by courageously facing the hills.

If there is a way in which you are wanting to grow today, if there is progress or maturation that you are longing for, then be courageous and imagine yourself possessing that trait or quality.  See yourself living that growth you would like to have.  I was inspired by the story “Left To Tell” by Immaculee Ilibagiza.  After surviving the Rwandan Holocaust, she set her mind to finding a job.  She said, “I envisioned it, I dreamed it, I prayed for it, and now I had it!”.  Neuroscience backs her up.  When we envision something; for instance, being at the ocean – the same neural circuitry lights up as if we are actually staring at it!  So live big.  Your imagination is the limit.  Set your sights high.  Whether it is embodying patience with your children or learning to paint – allow the desire you feel for that to motivate you.  Then repeatedly imagine yourself engaging with life in that new way.  After some time and practice, you may be very pleasantly surprised.  I hope that you will.  Dream big with me today!

Did you ever have the ability, as a child, to get fully immersed in the activity at hand?  Throwing rocks in the creek, playing with dolls, riding a bike, playing with the dog, cops & robbers, etc…?  Most young children have that ability.  And then we adults, we start training them out of that as soon as we can – “put your shoes on now, stop playing it’s time to eat, I need you to focus on this now, don’t follow that bubble we have to go now”.  Well, and what are we supposed to do – that’s the way our world works.  I always knew, growing up, that work was more valued than play; but, I had never seen it more blatantly labeled in black and white than yesterday.  I was reading a children’s biography about a scientist.  One of the historical notes was that the Puritans believed that children needed their parents’ permission to play.  Seriousness was valued.  Harsh punishment for stepping out of the boundaries was encouraged.  It became so clear to me- in that instant.  Many of us Americans were raised, through generational transmission and a plethora of subtle cues, “people who are playful aren’t as valuable as those who work hard.  We loudly value performance and accomplishment.  If you have to play as a child, then fine.  But you had better start outgrowing it as soon as possible.  Get serious.  Get prepared.  Life is a lot of hard work and planning and preparing.  Then if you plan and prepare enough, one day you can relax.  Phew – I’m exhausted just thinking about it!  Fortunately for us who are living now, there is plenty of research that shows that happiness and playfulness are important factors for creativity and productivity.  Nurturing a couple of deep relationships and making time on a regular basis for activities for pure enjoyment go a long way toward living a healthy, productive, and spiritual life.  Today I will pick one thing and do it just for fun – just for the enjoyment.

I like to read people’s stories – and think about what factors and influences led them to be where they are today.  I was listening to an interview with a biography writer, and I felt inspired.  Why are biography’s just for a select group of people?  What if every American high schooler had the assignment to write their own “autobiography”?  What if, just for that time they were writing it, they had to stop and think about their lives – who they are to the people who love them; how they came to love dance, singing, juggling, soccer; what things are motivating to them; what are their regrets, losses, grievances about life?  What if every American high schooler had the chance to think about those things and then had the opportunity to share and talk about some of those things?  Then I think about the value there is for each of us in telling our stories.  Just putting words on paper or saying something out loud gives us a different perspective than when it’s just roaming around in our heads.  True – I’m not saying anyone would pay to read  my story – but value is often not about money.  I know my story matters significantly to at least a couple handfuls of people.  It makes me who I am – and I, along with you – my fellow humans, have tremendous value in this world.  I also think that telling our stories is a little like studying history.  It gives us opportunity to reflect, consider, and learn from our past.  It gives us an opportunity to approach our future with intention.  Today, let us take a moment to pause and say out loud or write down a part of our story.

What are we worth?  What are our lives worth?  Is there some number – 1-100?  And how would that number be calculated?  Is Einstein’s life or the Dhali Lama’s worth more?  What’s more important – the heart or the brain?  Hearing or sight?  A leg or an arm?  The truth is, we are all part of humanity – one human race.  Just as each organ or limb is part of one body.  Each of us has influence on one another.  Each of us plays an important part.  Every life impacts other lives.  To erase one life would be no small impact on the world.  We might not see it easily – but who were the people who impacted Einstein?  Whose influences molded him and led him to be at certain places at certain times?  To be able to connect with certain opportunities?  And if those people didn’t have the people who influenced them – how would that have shifted how they influenced him?  Make no mistake – we are a web.  Tangly and sticky, at times – but a web, nonetheless.  Today, I will value myself – not for the raw, measurable contribution I make in the world – but for how me just being me impacts others, who impact others.  Today I will remember that my worth is far too vast to calculate.

Is life perfect?  Certainly not.  Am I merely reveling in lavishness abounding?  Nope.  Am I without struggles and trials?  No way.  And… today I am grateful.  I am grateful for my husband who is playful, creative, and always growing.  I am grateful for my son, who looks at the world from a totally different box.  I am grateful for my daughter, who handles others with such care.  I am grateful for the amazing people that make my work so interesting and rewarding.  I am grateful to have walked along side another human as she passed from this life, as we know it.  I am grateful for my friends and family who encourage me, listen to my thoughts and contentions, and speak such kindnesses to me.  And I am grateful that my brain and body are allowing me to connect with feelings of gratefulness!  I hold onto them gently, knowing that they may pass.  There will be days ahead that I am not able to connect with gratefulness.  I don’t lament or reject those days – I know that they serve to deepen me and my experience, and to deepen my ability to appreciate gratefulness.  Today, I will enjoy these feelings.

We can tell when we are comparing ourselves to another person.  When we hear their story, we’ll either get a sense of judgment – “really, that’s all they did?  I could do it better than that” or a sense of shame and feeling small – “wow! I could never do that.  Look at how wonderful and amazing they seem.  I wonder why I’ve never been able to do something like that?  That could never happen for me.”  Comparing always leads to feeling one up or one down.  It doesn’t lead to a balanced appreciation for or recognition of who we are.  When we compare ourselves to others, we devalue our humanity and uniqueness.  No other person shares our exact set of personality, brain pathways, experiences, or life circumstances.  It is hurtful to ourselves and others to compare ourselves to them.  It takes us out of connection and into separation from others.  It robs us of our power, in this moment, to be creative and move toward what we want.  Today, I will refuse to compare myself to others.  I will notice their positive qualities with love and appreciation.  I will do the same for me.  I will notice the qualities about them, that are challenging for me, with compassion and grace.  I will do the same for me.

We are each a whole person.  We cannot express the fullness of who we are; while at the same time, denying a part of ourselves.  Sometimes, in life, we learn to hide parts of who we are.  We learn to put away thoughts, memories, hopes, and desires with the goal of making our lives less painful, scary, shameful, or guilty.  And that works for awhile.  For awhile we can pretend that something didn’t happen.  For awhile we can deny that trait in ourselves that causes us negative feelings.  For awhile we can go on skating around these treacherous places.  But then, one day, they catch up with us.  We notice that the dam gets leaky.  We notice sudden, intrusive thoughts or urges.  And we have to decide what to do with them.  Do we add a new layer in trying to stash them away?  Do we go to even greater lengths to shield ourselves and the world from them?  Or, do we decide that we are grown up now?  That we can face those things that felt overwhelming in the past?  That we can get the help we need in order to deal with and work through those things that kept us cut off from ourselves?  We are each a whole person.  We can pretend that we aren’t, but the pretending will only last so long.  Today, I will take steps to own and claim all of me.  And I will work to figure out what to do with those parts of me who were hidden or disowned.  I will gather them to me and start with simple, non-judging, acknowledgment.

Most of us have heard the metaphor about a caterpillar turning into a butterfly; and how we, as humans, as spiritual beings, etc… can transform or be transformed.  But I learned a little something more today about that process, that adds so much to the metaphor.  When a caterpillar is still developing in its egg (before it ever even becomes a fully developed caterpillar), it grows “imaginal discs” (groups of highly developed cells) – one for each of the body parts it will need to become an adult butterfly.  Later, when it digests itself in its cocoon, those imaginal discs do not get digested, but remain and fuel the process of the butterfly’s development and emergence.  This is exactly how we humans are.  As infants, we come into the world with “imaginal” discs, traits, characteristics, or whatever else you want to call them.  Those cells (parts of us) wait for the right circumstances, environment, and encouragement to turn us into moldable form.  Then these “imaginal” parts of us can do their jobs.  It is then that those traits can fuel our transformational process and be fully revealed and blossom.  I love that they are called “imaginal”.  I love that we can dream big.  That, in the course of our lives,  we can go from looking and feeling one way, to something completely different.  (I see it everyday.)  I love that life looks at us and imagines all whom we can be.  The research also tells us that, when we imagine something – a waterfall, ocean wave, etc.., the same neurons get activated that would do so if we were actually standing in front of a waterfall or ocean wave.  So, today I will take some time to dream my “imaginal” self.  I will envision myself in the biggest, most expansive way possible.  I will imagine myself as I am to become.  And I will be the butterfly.

Just finished a biography about Dr. Seuss, and this is a dedication to Theodore Seuss Geisel.  We all have a snuckle to cherish and share.  Some snuckles are brown, some orange, and some with flair.  “My snuckle belongs to me” we say.  And it does, it does! Enjoy it with much fun and with glee.  Your snuckle has color and texture and bounce.  Your snuckle is one that is not easily snuffed out.  Some folks will try to temper your snuckle.  They’ll cover and hide it and tell you it’s wrong.  They seem they don’t want your snuckle along.  But there is no one in the world with a snuckle like you.  Your snuckle is the one and only like you.  So whether your snuckle is big, red, or purple, or whether your snuckle is square with a nurple.  Don’t ever try to have someone else’s snuckle.  No, it’s not for you!  The world needs YOUR snuckle.  You have something to do.  Your snuckle is needed by all.  Your snuckle is a gift.  It is your call.  So love your snuckle and many will love it too.  And you’ll be doing your part of the snuckle  snugoo – that keeps all of us happy and dappy and loved.  It keeps us going, and marching in tune.  It keeps us marching all the way through gloomy lagoon.  I need your snuckle and you need mine.  We’ll share today.  And we’ll all be just fine!